Wakeup Breathing

it’s your choice………

admin — Sun, 14 Mar 2010 22:29:29 +0000

Everything any of us ever wanted to be in life all boils down to a choice. Kind of scary to think that everything we are or are not was probably our choice. We decided to not go to college or not try that new business idea. Sure we can all find lots of excuses to explain away our choices….I didn’t have the money for college, the business would probably fail so why try.

These are just excuses to provide cover for the reality of your choices. But how do we know if we are making the right choices? We don’t always know.

But to have a good idea if you are making the right choice is first get your mind into it. Condition your thoughts to visualize what you want to happen.

Not just a fuzzy daydream but a full fledged, honest-to-goodness, day-by-day kind of visualizing. Say you want to be a successful manager – envision yourself dressing up in power suits, going to a corner office with a view, getting pats on the back for good work, speaking at conferences, etc.

Remember, your mind is your most powerful tool. If you aim on getting that corner office or academy award or gold medal, it will show you how to get it. Whether the solution is for you to study more or practice better, your mind will direct you to it. Some people use affirmations, mantras, physical reminders, diaries and whatever works that can remind them about their goal. Getting another person or a support group to remind you will also be great! There are support groups for just about everything you just need to find one. And if you can’t find one then start one. There has to be others that might just join your group because they have the same interests.

On the other hand, you can keep on telling yourself “no, I couldn’t do it” then you really can’t but it is your choice. There will be tons of excuses that you can fall back on anyway. Notice how convenient it is to just come up with them instead of aiming for something better? That’s where the power of your brain comes up again – negative or positive thoughts will influence what you are. Look around and observe – some people walk around with an upbeat attitude and some people are known as prophets of doom. You don’t even have to ask these people how they think because you can see it on them. And generally speaking, don’t you notice that the upbeat ones are the ones who are successful and happy?

So, do you want to act on stage, write horror books, or climb Everest? Whatever you want, it is your choice to do or not to do it. Think hard.
Then take your next step – go and do it.

8 helpful tips to deal with anxiety…….

admin — Thu, 21 Jan 2010 17:59:13 +0000

Anxiety is the feeling of fear or apprehension that is intense enough to disrupt one’s daily activities. It hits anyone at any point in their lives, regardless of sex and age. If you suffer from anxiety and you let anxiety overcome you, you then let stress and unhappiness overrule you, through being paralyzed by anxiety. You need to learn how to overcome it or at least reduce its effects. Here are eight tips that can help you conquer anxiety:

1. Be the master of your thoughts. Inability to control what you think strengthens your tendency for anxiety. Anxiety gains momentum when you entertain negative thoughts.

2. Practice self-discipline and control over your feelings. Anxiety is like taking a ride on a rollercoaster. Once you start entertaining negative thoughts and fears, they become a mantra that would perpetuate themselves. The best thing to do is to cut them off right then and there. Distract yourself, divert your thoughts, or go talk to someone and have him or her correct your fears. Most of the time, anxious thoughts are distortions of reality. It is best to have someone tell you the objective facts, and show you that you are grossly exaggerating your fears. If they are valid, you can seek reassurance of a happy outcome or have the other person suggest ways to work around the problem/s you face.

3. Think positive. As they say, try to think of the glass as being half-full. Thinking it is half-empty will only result in a never-ending cycle of negative thinking. Thoughts give birth to thoughts, and what you fill your mind with will spill over into reality. Our mental mantras become self-fulfilling prophecies. When we allow thoughts to perpetuate in our minds, they burst forth into reality as, as was said, self-fulfilling prophecies. The key is not to go “I won’t think negatively. I won’t think negatively.” Rather, you should force yourself to fixate on positive thoughts. Write a list of the things you want to be and the things you want to happen in your life, enough that you could say every single morning within 3 minutes, to yourself. Then every morning, when you wake up or before you leave for work or school, say your affirmations to yourself. Example: “I am beautiful, articulate, and I will make that sale today!” Then all throughout the day, when you catch yourself worrying, stop in your tracks, and force yourself to enumerate 5 things you are thankful for today. Repeat as needed.

4. Keep yourself busy and on the go. Never allow yourself to have idle moments. The moment you get up from bed, keep yourself busy right away and keep moving throughout the day. Volunteer to clean the house for the day or tell somebody that you will do the dishes for dinner. You can also read books or magazines, engage in exercise, or meditate; to keep yourself from worrying/anxiety. Being idle will not solve your problems and the moments when your mind isn’t busy doing something worthwhile will only invite more anxiety.

5. Work out a plan and try to accomplish it. Whether it’s how to improve yourself or a plan to solve the very problem that is causing your anxieties, doing this exercise would let you see that you can do something about your situation. This would also help you realize that you have control over yourself. Increasing control over your own life leads you to feel less anxious, because anxiety is an issue of control: the lack of it.

6. Consult someone that can be trusted. Sharing your worries with another person lightens the worries and puts them in the proper perspective. The premise is that you talk with the aim to lessen your anxiety.

7. Laughter is the best medicine. Laughter can ease your burdens. Be in the company of amusing friends or indulge in activities that can put laughter in your life, like watching The Three Stooges.

8. If current issues make you anxious, switch off the television. Reduce the time you spend watching news and avoid watching shows that depress and make you more anxious before you go to sleep. Though professional help is needed in extreme cases, anxiety is manageable, if you know how to get around it. Do follow these helpful tips and you will see your anxieties eased.

tools to help overcome lifes problems……

admin — Mon, 18 Jan 2010 01:56:40 +0000

Problems are present in everyone’s daily life. Life is sometimes filled with never-ending problems. We all experience problems at work, home, with relationships, children, society, etc. They just creep up everywhere in any area of our life. When problems overshadow you, you can be affected by physical and mental stresses.

Problems seem to be one common factor that pervades each and every soul on planet earth. Could we look at problems in a positive way and overcome them easily? We can.
Problems are only problems if we define them so. But you can look at problems in a different light. Whenever you encounter a problem try to look at it indifferently.

If you analyze your problems they may turn out to be learning events in real life.

Here are some easy ways to overcome problems:

Own the problem – People sometimes blame others when they are faced with problems. Problems never go away with this approach. Instead, accept responsibility for the problem. Do not blame anyone else or any other circumstance for your problem. When you own a problem, you take up the issue in your hand and start to work for a solution with a personal interest. This is the first sign of progress towards a solution.

Define the problem – You have to define a problem in order to understand the exact issue. Analyze it to understand it well. Ask the right questions - what is the problem, how did it start, how bad is the effect, etc. When you look into the problem rather than at the problem, you get to the core of the problem. Getting at the root cause would eradicate the problem forever. So define and look for ways to eradicate the root cause of your problem.

Analyze the ‘ifs’ and ‘but’s - Ask more questions such as: ‘what if the problem is not solved immediately? What is the worst outcome? ‘But, if not solved, how long could you go on with this problem?’ etc. Be prepared to face risks and proceed to accept the worst. After good brainstorming, you can feel more calm since you are ready to face the issue.

List possible solutions – When you are calm look around for possible solutions. Make a list of all possible answers. Again brainstorm. You could examine and evaluate all possible solutions. You would be surprised at the possible answers you have at hand for your problem.

Select the best solution - After examining and evaluating and brainstorming, you would be able choose the best possible solution. Once you decide on a particular solution take steps to act on it immediately.

Focus only the end results – Focus only on what you desire to achieve. According to the law of universe, your thoughts, feelings, intentions and actions create your reality.

So remember, whenever you have a problem – own it, define it, analyze the ‘if’s and ‘but’s, list your solutions, brainstorm and select the best one, act on it immediately and focus on positive results. It can be that simple!

4 tips to empower yourself…..

admin — Mon, 11 Jan 2010 01:42:49 +0000

We all face hardships at some point in our lives. Some of us own responsibility and get on with our lives while most of us blame others. When you own responsibility for yourself you empower yourself. You are the cause and your life experiences are the results in your life. You determine the direction of your life. You are in control of your life.
If you are not able to explain why your life is as it is, you are probably giving your power away to someone else, are you? Most of us tend to blame something else or someone else or our fate for all bad experiences in our life such as abusive childhood, loss of a loved one or broken relationships. When you are not in control of yourself or your life that means you are powerless. Blaming is a disempowering emotion.

If you think by blaming others for your life you are getting away from problems you are completely wrong. Your life problems would stay the same and recur again and again as long as you make someone else responsible for your life. You give others power to control you and your life. So your life problems would tend to stay the way they are until you take back your power and claim full responsibility for your emotions, actions and life as a whole.

True empowerment is taking responsibility for your life so that you are free to do whatever you want to do and be anything you choose to be.

Here are 4 tips to empower you:

1) Make your own choices - Life is full of choices and you have the freedom to choose. You learn only through trial and error. Be bold and accept the outcome of your decisions. If your choice is correct, be happy. If not do not blame yourself or others. Instead, analyze where you went wrong and correct yourself. The next time around, you may be able to make the right choices.

2) Practice deep breathing - If you make it a habit to practice deep breathing throughout the day, you would have clarity in your thoughts. You feel more relaxed to think clearly and make good judgments of your situations.

3) Feel grateful - Gratitude is something we never show for many things we enjoy in our life. Instead of cursing your problems look around you and realize how blessed you are to have nature bestow you good health, sunshine, food, good relationships, fresh air, etc. When you feel grateful for these things you are convinced that life is not bad at all.

4) Develop mental awareness - Observe your thoughts. Are they good or bad? Are they positive or negative? If your thoughts are positive it is good. You could act on them with positive results. What if you have negative thoughts? You could still control them if you are aware of them. Empower yourself by being aware of your good and bad thoughts.

When you deal with your own pains and pleasures you are the controller of your life. Just know that no one else could take away your power to control your life and events because you are the master of your destiny.

being positive in negative times….

admin — Mon, 07 Dec 2009 01:43:59 +0000

what is money…..

admin — Sat, 28 Nov 2009 22:41:47 +0000

This post is just a bit different than my others. I did this video to discuss money….what is money and what many think isn’t money.
With the current economic environment and with the government spending out of control I wanted to give people something to think about…

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curbing negative thoughts…………

admin — Sun, 08 Nov 2009 23:58:14 +0000

Consider this scenario: You are about to go onstage in front of hundreds of people to give a speech. Your lips are quivering, your hands are sweating, your stomach seems to be infested with millions of butterflies, and you feel like you are on the verge of fainting. Familiar? Those are the telltale signs that one is nervous or feeling utterly uncomfortable.

If you believe that mantras, or the act of repeatedly telling yourself stuff, like “I’m not nervous” or “I can do this” can alleviate your nervousness – better think again. Contrary to what most people believe and practice, doing so only intensifies the tension. Think of it this way: if one is already aware that he is nervous, then there is really no sense in making himself believe that he isn’t because; he’ll only end up looking like a fool.

And, so, you wonder, what then should one do to alleviate his or her tension? The answer is quite simple and something that you wouldn’t have expected. You just have to try channelling your energy towards something else.

Don’t dwell on your negative thoughts and feelings, but, instead, try to divert the spotlight away from yourself. Make an effort to think about how your performance would affect the audience, how good you’ll feel after the presentation, and how self-satisfying it would be to hear the audience applaud after all has been said and done.

It’s just the same when we deal with negative thoughts. Telling yourself “I will never do it again” won’t get you anywhere. You know why? It’s because humans are innately affected by reverse psychology. There are times that the more we tell ourselves not to do it, the more chances that we end up doing it. In short, those kinds of things usually backfire and end up shooting us right in the face. Practically and realistically, it’s all just a matter of refocusing and changing one’s perspective.

As the saying goes, “the grass is greener on the other side”, so when you feel like you are on the unpleasant side, refocus your thinking and try to see what the other option has to offer. Try to put yourself in the shoes of other people. In relation to the scenario previously given, the grass on the other side is the audience.

If you are the audience, you would be pleased if the one who is going to give a speech or perform on the stage is someone who has self-confidence, determination and spirit to give his or her very best, wouldn’t you? In that case, having the drive to give your audience a sense of fulfillment is your trail towards achieving your own self-fulfillment.

Again, the perks of selflessness become evident in this situation. By thinking of how others would feel, of how others would benefit from what you are doing, that will be the moment you will be unchained from bunched up negative feelings.

hope for the best, prepare for the worst…….

admin — Fri, 09 Oct 2009 00:56:11 +0000

Here in southern California this time of year is the time for Santa Ana winds. And with those winds we sometimes have fires. In 2003 and 2007 we had some horrible fires killing many people and destroying thousands of homes and property. This year will be no different, we will have winds. Hopefully we will escape any major fires either in the state or right here in Ramona. But even without a fire we all still have reason to prepare for emergencies.

Because with a fire or an earthquake that is an event you know is happening or did happen. You can’t escape the fact that there is a fire burning or the ground is shaking under you.

So have you prepared for an emergency? Do you have some emergency food to carry you and your family through a period when you may not be able to get food. Do you have emergency water in case there is no water available for days? What about candles, first aid kits, medicines you might need, flashlights, matches or even food for your pets.….you get the idea. Some may not agree but I would also include a gun and ammo as part of emergency preparations. This is just a small list of items we all need just in case. Today most emergency food supplies now are long shelf life of 5-20 years so they can be stored for long periods. Even most canned goods are fine for a couple years. Emergency supplies are like insurance, you buy it but hope you never need it.

But there is another reason to prepare right now with the current economy continuing its slide downward. An economic emergency can be every bit as devastating as a fire or earthquake. In some ways even more devastating because you may not see unemployment coming until it’s walking you out the door. So would it be at least a bit more comforting to know you at least have 30-90 days emergency food and other supplies to help you though the event. There are chances of even a financial collapse affecting the entire country which could affect food, water and fuel supplies for weeks or months.

None of this was meant to scare anyone it is only to get you to think about the “what if”.
What if we had a major earthquake or a financial meltdown. Will you and your family not only survive but thrive because you were prepared for the worst? I surely hope we never need any of this but also if we do we have prepared for the worst.

Steve can be contacted at steven@ramonahome.com

a near death experience………….?

admin — Mon, 14 Sep 2009 01:43:00 +0000

The other day I went to the dentist to have my teeth cleaned. Being someone not comfortable with tools and hands in my mouth the I request to be given a little nitrous oxide to help me relax.

I have been doing this for a couple years without any adverse reactions or events. But this time something different happened. I was only in the chair for 10 minutes breathing nitrous. But all of a sudden I was going way deeper than I have ever experienced.

I couldn’t open my eyes and normally even with my eyes closed I can see the light through my eye lids. But this time everything was completely black….no light at all.

I think I motioned to the hygenist to turn the nitrous down as I knew I was going to deep.

While everything was black I think I was still conscience but I don’t know for sure. But I could hear the hygenist calling my name but it seemed her voice was miles away…..then a thought came over me….I’m dead!

I started thinking I would hear paramedics any minute trying to revive me. I think then she noticed I was in trouble and switched the nitrous off and I was getting pure oxygen……

I believe I stopped breathing for a short time as all of a sudden I gasped for air and remember breathing as if I had just run a couple miles. When I was finally able to open my eyes then hygenist was looking at me toatlly freaked out…

she said she thought she had lost me, the doctor came in and they sat me up but kept me on oxygen for about 30 minutes until I recovered.

I don’t really know what happened. I think I stopped breathing for a short time and was probably out also.

But the weird thing is that was Wednseday and today is Sunday. Ever since then I have felt the most incredible calm over me. Everything seems smooth and stress seems to be not a part of me anymore……even thinking of death doesn’t seem scarry…

I can’t explain what happened a couple days ago but it was something profound…..if this is what people experience when they have a near death event then I can really understand why it affects some so much.

Steve

take responsibility for your procrastination…..

admin — Sun, 06 Sep 2009 17:19:05 +0000

All procrastination is the result of deluding ourselves. Procrastinators deny reality, refusing to accept responsibility for their lives. To defeat procrastination, we must stop playing games with ourselves. You can’t overcome procrastination until you accept the fact that you are responsible for what you make of your life. That may be more honesty than many people are capable of, but there is no other way to achieve a richer life.

The first step toward overcoming procrastination is recognizing that it’s a problem. Procrastinators have big problems and small problems, but most of their problems are caused by procrastination.

Procrastinators share certain traits:

- They know what they should do about a problem, and in many cases they know what specific action needs to be taken. Yet they find reasons to avoid action.

- They are reluctant to do anything about a problem now, but vow to take action at some vague time in the future.

- They promise to take action when the “right” circumstances present themselves. By making performance of the job depend on something else, they justify their decision to delay action. They delude themselves into thinking that their hands are tied. They would like to do something but can’t, they tell themselves it’s not their fault.

Research shows that you can develop new habits in just two weeks if you’re serious about changing. Think about people you know who always get things done. What are their work habits? How do they approach unappealing tasks? How do they stay focused?

Here are some simple tips that can help you take charge of your life today:

- Mentally prepare yourself to be productive. You can begin every day in prayer and meditation. I keep inspirational messages where I can see them. Visualize your success during the day. Procrastination is a real monster, and it won’t go away unless you do something about it every day. If you are passionate about a job, you can get it done at any time of day and under any circumstances. The problem is when to tackle the hardest and most tedious jobs. Always ask: At what time of day am I most productive? Most people say they’re most productive early in the morning; by mid-afternoon it’s harder for them to sit still and concentrate on work. Try to schedule the hard jobs for your most productive time.

- Don’t over-socialize at work. Office chitchat and gossip keep many people from getting more accomplished. Let people know when you don’t want to be disturbed. Think about the things in your work environment that contribute to staying focused. What things distract you or make you want to postpone a job? How can you redesign your environment to eliminate causes of procrastination?

You are not a victim of your circumstances. You can overcome procrastination now-you can do the things that need to be done. And you can learn to distinguish between the things that need to be done now and the things that can wait.